Learning to take care of Myself Series : 1

Exhausted, that is the word I am using this very late evening to describe myself. My life right now is full to the brim, things are so tight that I feel like I'm living in a sardine can. Today I had conversations with several important people in my life that led me to the above conclusion. I want to learn how to take care of myself once again. I don't want to complain, everyone has their burdens to carry however one must listen when one's body starts complaining. I am currently a student , a partime- store assistant, president to a campus fellowship, youth leader and a student representative. I am EXHAUSTED. At the beginning of the academic year  I planned to  quietly study whilst continuing to do the work I value most, the work of God. Due to unforeseen blows to my finances I  found myself looking for a job however the shift pattern is not convenient in any shape or form. I am an ambitious person, I want to do everything in my power to achieve my main goal, which is to become an individual who is capable of making lasting change  however such a busy lifestyle is starting to have a detrimental effect on my health.

My Turning point.
For the past 2 days though I slept enough I have woken up very tired, yesterday I left a lecture in such a daze and forced myself to work in the evening. My loved ones and acquaintances  have advised to a blood test however  I am very squeamish. Thank God I  know a very  patient nurse who understands my fears and puts me at ease, I must buy her some flowers next time I go to see her. I'm a fully grown adult and for someone who is also part of the health work force I know how annoying it is to have a person as squeamish as me walk through the doors, to top it off I have veins that dance about like Elvis Presley. 

Identifying the My issues
1) My diet is a mess - I met up with one of my friends today who told me that I  must stop eating the way I do and  though it may be time consuming and slightly more expensive to eat healthy I must give it a good go. At the end of our conversation we came to an agreement, I will send her pictures of my meals and confess if  I eat something she would not be proud of.

2) Something's gotta Give: I might have to take a break from being the youth leader, I am less effective in my current state but I still have to make peace with this idea. It is not sitting well with me at all ! I can't decide what to let go of.

I am starting a journey today, I have never consciously set out to take care of myself but as I age I don't want my bad habits to grow with me..

The problem with pride.

Pride is the slow devourer of man, it plants seeds of strife and arrogance within ones soul. It not only affects your relationship with others but affects your relationship with God.

Psalm 51:17
The sacrifices God desires are a humble spirit--O God, a humble and repentant heart you will not reject.

God loves to see you and me humbled in his presence. Pride blinds us from seeing our own faults and makes us unable to love others as God loves us.
People tend to be ruthless when judging others, there's no room for consideration. But a friend told me today "I am a sinner,but the fact God woke me up today shows me that he still believes in me. He does not see me as my present but sees me as what I will become"

If God allows even your worst enemies to get up in the morning, it shows that he still loves them and you should too. Pride stops us from doing this, it eats away at any chance of empathy we could have for others. One of the most severe consequences of Pride is a weak prayer life.Instead of humbling ourselves in prayer and asking for God's guidance we would rather do things on our own and only consider God When things get really messy.

proverbs 16:18
Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall.
It really  isn't useful for any christian   to be arrogant or full of Pride. It only leads us to fall, we Christians need to uplift and encourage one another.

On a final note: my personal experience with pride
I'm a very logical person  and I think things should be done a certain way so that God will be pleased with you. That's my pride. The bible teaches that nothing you do will ever win you a place with God ... Jesus has done that. He is the final and only acceptable sacrifice. So how do I deal with this.. I humble myself in prayer. Pride is the a problem mankind struggles with, it is pride that make us think that we should be treated a certain way by people.when we are treated any differently we are flummoxed and slowly we become angry and bitter.
I'm drawing from personal experience, but I pray for anyone else who may struggle with pride. Let's free
 ourselves  from its chains and live in the freedom available to us through Christ .

Time is God's Currency

We are living in a society where everything is fast paced and digital. There are so many things you that could easily get caught up doing and before you know it  24hrs fly by. Being a busy person is not the issue here but if you are a person wanting to see the manifestation of God in your life then time management becomes an issue. I have problems with time management myself, therefore it is from experience that I write. I was once in a youth programme and the preacher said "a lot of youth have Zill but no subtance". From His whole sermon that's what stuck out for me. Having Zill but no Substance, it described me at the time well. I was very energetic to so the work of God and I was very passionate about him and his word but I lacked substance, all because I did not spend enough time with him.
A fire without continuous fuel will burn itself out, and this is the case for passionate Christians who do not spend one on one time with God.  This applies to the everyone from the pastors to members of the congregation.

To be honest, the idea of one on one time does not have to be the traditional sitting quietly. Every moment of your life is a chance to communicate with God. when you someone upsets you during the day you can talk to him, when you appriciate the beauty of nature you can thank him, when you are being tempted you can ask him for grace and he will always be there.
Here are some bible verses that talk about spending time with God.

1 Samuel 1:19   They rose early in the morning and worshiped before the LORD; then they went back to their house at  Ramah. 



Romans 12:2 “Do not be conformed to this world,  but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.“

Deciding to take the guitar more seriously

I bought a guitar around a year ago and I've
 learnt to play it to a certain point. I would personally love to be it really good at it so i think i should take it more seriously. They always say practice makes perfect.. so i should put it to the test yeah? yeah ! anyways if i get really good i will upload a voice not of me playing it. I was searching how to get better, it seems learning lots of songs is a way and practicing hing techniques of moving my fingers around the guitar. To be honest when i first picked up the guitar it was the most awkward hing ever. my fingers were so stiff and i was like am i really gonna get good at this, but a year later with of and on practice i can play a tune or two.

Freind or Foe

Recently I have been wondering about a certain "friend" in my life, its been really strange you know. I feel like I have good reason to think that this person feels forced to be friends with me. okay lets review the signs?
1) Does not say hi by themselves
2) only speaks properly when other friends are around( the ones that he gets along with)
3) sees me obviously sitting by myself but chooses to sit behind me
 I don't like this type of situation, i am all up for True friendship... i don't like pretend friends, its such a waste of time. I've been thinking of just turning around one day and just saying " you don't have to force yourself to be a friend of mine, just cause we have friends in common". As for me I have no issues with the guy, and am called to love everybody. Therefore I keep treating him nicely, but its getting a bit tiring. On the other hand I guess others people behaviour should not influence my behaviour and alter my good intentions. But I am human, i really do notice it. ahh well... I  think one of these days I may end up saying something, LOL it would probably make things awkward for the friendship group. lol I honestly dislike causing friction! but its cool, its coming to the end of this semester. I have to concentrate on Exams  now.

Are we friends?

someone once said

if you ever have

to ask

this question you

know

the answer already.

Where are your Bus manners!!

Today was a very long day and i was looking foward to getting home,  taking a nice nap and having a cup of tea. however due to unforeseen events that was ruined, I am home now but the journey back was very much ANNOYING. If there was an award for most annoying bus passenger in the world this man would win it.
This is how a normal bus sanario would play out
you come in, you see its packed there are 1 or two seats left. the person who is sitting already sees your struggle has empathy for you and welcomes you to sit down. making enough ROOM for you.

My sanario
I walk into the bus is packed and yes only one seat, i seat next to this man thinking he was going to move his arms. But did he not, He deliberately made me feel uncomfortable by jabbing his elbows into my arm. pretending not to sense my discomfort. i hate contact with strangers so i tried to put my bag in the way. it didnt work. I was Outraged!! I ended up moving when some people got off but that man needs some better Bus manners. Geez

Life Changer

Life changing experience....
Okay so last week I went over to my aunts for a week, one evening i was on the bus 81 and as I was sat there something kept pushing me to stand up and talk about my faith. It was sooo nagging it was like "talk about Christ". I was like is this just me talking?.At the end of the day I got off the bus without saying anything. But as I got out of the bus i prayed and I was like "God if you really want me to do this, let it happen again". I may be loud but am not usually soo confident that I would stand up in a bus.

Anyway some days went past and i was on my way to church on a Sunday, i was on the bus and it happened again. I was like are you serious? And this time, with my nervous self I went in front of the bus and spoke to the people on it. I talked to them about my faith and i said "Some of you here may not believe in Christ, but if you are ever in a DARK place call unto him, he wants to help". I left it at that and went back to my seat.

I can hardly explain how i felt afterwards. I can't it on words.
Its been couple of days since i did that, i was speaking to my house mate about it and she said i had to share.

so whats the point of me posting this? well its to encourage people, it may seem crazy but do what God tells you to, no matter what people think. You don't know who you are reaching.